Famous quotes, witty quotes, and funny quotations

"Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo."

- H. G. Wells (1866-1946)

"Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever."

- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

"Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake."

- Chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956)

"Don't be so humble - you are not that great."

- Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat

"His ignorance is encyclopedic"

- Abba Eban (1915-2002)

"If a man does his best, what else is there?"

- General George S. Patton (1885-1945)

"Political correctness is tyranny with manners."

- Charlton Heston (1924-)

"You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality."

- Ayn Rand (1905-1982)

"When one person suffers from a delusion it is called insanity; when many people suffer from a delusion it is called religion."

- Robert Pirsig (1948-)

"Sex and religion are closer to each other than either might prefer."

- Saint Thomas Moore (1478-1535)

"I can write better than anybody who can write faster,
and I can write faster than anybody who can write better."

- A. J. Liebling (1904-1963)

"People demand freedom of speech to make up
for the freedom of thought which they avoid."

- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)

"Give me chastity and continence, but not yet."

- Saint Augustine (354-430)

"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that
counts can be counted."

- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human
stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to
get its pants on."

- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)

"You may not be interested in war, but war is interested in you."

- Leon Trotsky (1879-1940)

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has
endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo
their use."

- Galileo Galilei (1564-1642)

"We are all atheists about most of the gods humanity has ever believed in. Some of us just go one god further."

- Richard Dawkins (1941-)

"The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing
without work."

- Emile Zola (1840-1902)

"This book fills a much-needed gap."

- Moses Hadas (1900-1966) in a review

"The full use of your powers along lines of excellence."

- definition of "happiness" by John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)

"I'm living so far beyond my income that we may
almost be said to be living apart."

- e e cummings (1894-1962)

"Give me a museum and I'll fill it."

- Pablo Picasso (1881-1973)

"Assassins!"

- Arturo Toscanini (1867-1957) to his orchestra

"I'll moider da bum."

- Heavyweight boxer Tony Galento, when asked what he thought of
William Shakespeare

"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice.
But in practice, there is."

- Yogi Berra